To Marry or Not to Marry

August 9, 2021

His disciples said to Him, "If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry." But He said to them, "All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given: For there are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother's womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He who is able to accept it, let him accept it" (Matthew 19:10-12).

A Christian should choose his/her marriage partner carefully with much prayer and with the guidance of the Holy Spirit. Choosing a mate is not like choosing a new car or house. A commitment to marriage should only be made with a person who shares one’s spiritual values and commitments. There is no human joy or fulfillment greater than that which is experienced by a husband and wife who love each other fully and completely, and who, together, love the Lord Jesus Christ fully and completely.

The disciples of Jesus said, upon hearing His statement on marriage and divorce, if such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry. To a certain extent that is true. However, it was God’s original intent for the man and woman to be husband and wife for reasons stated earlier: (1) to procreate and populate the earth, (2) to bring creation under the authority and control of the Lord God, and (3) to rule over God’s creation under His sovereign authority (Genesis 1:28). These purposes cannot be achieved apart from a cooperative companionship based on a commitment to each other and to God.

While being married has its issues, staying single has its issues as well. Temptations are often faced alone. Not every Christian can live a godly life alone. While it is good to remain single for spiritual reasons and purposes, it is better to marry than to yield to fleshly, sinful lusts. (1 Corinthians 7:8-9) But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

Jesus said not everyone can accept a single lifestyle, only those to whom it has been given. In other words, being a single adult can’t be wholeheartedly accepted with mind, emotions, spirit, and body, by sheer human willpower. Nor can a single lifestyle be successfully lived by simply applying certain biblical principles. Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 7:7, For I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that. Only those to whom the Lord has given this spiritual gift can successfully survive in it as a happy and effective Christian servant of the Lord.

“Lord Jesus, thank You for Your instruction regarding marriage and singleness. Being married has been one of the greatest joys in my life. Having a loving, caring, committed wife who serves You alongside me, who is my counselor, my co-worker, and my comfort, has been a blessing beyond measure. Thank You for the wonderful gift You have given me in Nancy. I bless Your holy name for her. Amen.”


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